Best Tips for Asking for a Letter of Recommendation (Plus Example)

I love that you are here! To me, it shows that you know the importance of what most people call “social proof.” If you’re unfamiliar with the phrase, it basically means written testimonials, references, and recommendations to prove to others that you are the real deal. It’s something that hiring managers and recruiters use to make decisions about who they interview, hire, or promote. No matter what situation you are currently in, I’m going to show you exactly how to ask for a letter of recommendation.

As we go through the steps of how to ask for a letter of recommendation, I’m also going to share with you the answers to commonly asked questions when it comes to everything about how letters of recommendation. Throughout this article, here are the questions I will answer.

How to ask for a letter of recommendation (of course!)

Who do I ask for a letter of recommendation?

How do you politely ask for a letter of recommendation?

Is it OK to ask for a letter of recommendation by email? How do you ask for a letter of recommendation status?

That’s right, we’re going to cover every aspect so that you can leave feeling empowered and ready to take next steps. Ready to dive in? Let’s do it!

How to ask for a letter of recommendation

Know what skills and capabilities you want to be highlighted

Only you know what your goals are for the future, no one is going to read your mind. While a general recommendation letter is great, an intentional one can get you hired into your dream job! Take a moment to think about what you want to do next. What specific skills are needed? What character traits must you have? What formal qualifications are needed?

If you’re unsure about the answer, browse online! Take advantage of current job postings and identify common language throughout the postings. Whatever skills, traits, and characteristics keep popping up in current postings, that’s what you want your recommendations to highlight.

Again, your goal is to be intentional and have a direction. It is also beneficial to the person who agrees to write a letter of recommendation for you because they know what to focus on and won’t feel like they’re starting from a blank slate.

Be confident in your ask

Believe it or not, your energy matters when asking for a letter of recommendation. If you ask with hesitancy in your voice or you give off the impression that you’re asking too much, it could impact how seriously someone takes you. Avoid mumbling, maintain eye contact, and be straightforward with your ask. Don’t feel bad about asking for a letter of recommendation, remember, they are standard practice for career growth and development.

Make sure to provide plenty of time

Be considerate. As a previous manager, I can tell you that writing a letter of recommendation takes time and when my current or previous staff would ask me to do it at the last minute, I found it to be rude and inconsiderate. Just keep in mind, people are busy and have hectic schedules and commitments. If possible, give your references enough time to write a strong recommendation. I recommend giving at least a 2-week notice, but keep in mind that it takes most professionals at least 30 days before they turn it around. Sometimes you’ll get lucky and get someone quick and efficient, but people usually take a while to put together letters.

Remember there are many people who want to write you an outstanding letter of recommendation, but you have to be considerate and gracious during the process. If you’re in a time crunch, consider sending a recommendation request with a note that includes your awareness of the quick turnaround. Also provide them with the option of providing a phone reference instead. Showing gratitude and offering other options is always a great way to continue maintaining strong relationships.

Create a well-rounded list of potential references

If you’re wondering, yes it does matter who your references are. Selecting the right individuals to vouch for your capabilities creates a lasting impression on recruiters, hiring managers, and executives. It’s easy to automatically assume that the only person who is qualified to give you a recommendation is your supervisor. While a letter of recommendation from your supervisor is great, it’s only a start. It’s a good idea to think about the amount of people that you help, have conversations with, do favors for, and interact with on a daily basis. All of these individuals have been able to witness your skills and abilities on a professional level. They have also seen different sides of you and can provide a strong letter of recommendation that showcases who you are and what you can bring to the table. 

Need some inspiration on potential people you can ask for recommendations? Here are my top 10 recommendations on who to ask for a reference letter from. 

Who to Ask for a Letter of Recommendation

Former Employers (including your Supervisor/Manager): Someone who directly supervised you in a previous job and can provide an effective letter that speaks to your work ethic, skills, and accomplishments.

Current Supervisor/Manager: If applicable, your current boss can provide insights into your current performance and growth.

Colleague/Coworker: A peer who has worked closely with you and can attest to your teamwork, collaboration, and contributions. (Try to get at least two who can speak on your behalf). 

Committee Lead: If you’ve participated in a committee, ask the person that leads it for a recommendation

Mentor: Someone who has guided you in your career or personal development journey and can speak to your growth, resilience, skill development and potential.

Teacher/Professor: If you’re a recent graduate, a teacher or professor can discuss your academic abilities, work ethic, and character.

Client/Customer: If you’ve worked directly with clients or customers, their testimonials can highlight your professionalism, communication skills, and customer satisfaction.

Business Partner/Collaborator: Someone you’ve collaborated with on projects or ventures who can speak to your collaboration skills, reliability, and results. Also, if you have a side hustle with a business partner, ask them to give you a reference as well. 

Executive Director/CEO: If you’ve worked closely with high-level executives, their endorsement can carry weight and speak to your strategic thinking and leadership potential.

Nonprofit Organization Leader: Particularly relevant if you’ve volunteered or worked with nonprofits, their endorsement can highlight your commitment to social causes and community involvement.

Industry Expert/Professional: Someone well-respected in your field who can vouch for your expertise, knowledge, and contributions to the industry. Think about who you’ve met at professional events and stayed in contact with! 

Professional Association Leader: If you’re a member of a professional association, the leader or a prominent member can provide a recommendation based on your involvement and contributions.

Workshop/Conference Organizer: If you’ve spoken at workshops or conferences, the organizer can testify to your presentation skills, expertise, and impact on the audience.

Co-Worker from Cross-Functional Team: A colleague from a different department or team with whom you’ve collaborated can offer insights into your adaptability, communication, and teamwork.

Internship Supervisor: If you’ve completed internships, your supervisor can speak to your performance, initiative, and potential in a professional setting.

University Professionals: Particularly useful for recent graduates, an academic advisor, admissions officers, faculty members, guidance counselor, or a college professor can provide a good letter of recommendation based on their knowledge of your career development and academic achievements during your academic journey.

Volunteer Coordinator: If you’ve volunteered for organizations or events, the volunteer coordinator can speak to your commitment, reliability, and impact on the community.

Former Direct Report/Intern: If you’ve managed or mentored others in previous roles, their endorsement can showcase your leadership, mentorship, and ability to develop talent.

How to ask for a Letter of Recommendation- Tips continued

Build and maintain positive relationships

Relationships are everything and they have the power to open doors you didn’t even know existed. Yes, it is important to build and retain relationships in your current role, but don’t forget about maintaining relationships from your prior roles. Trust me, I know how easy it is to forget about relationships when you leave a department or organization, but you never know who you will need in the future. While I don’t expect you to talk to previous connections on a weekly or monthly basis, an occasional check-in (once or twice a year) never hurts. Building and maintaining genuine connections built on mutual respect and shared goals are more likely to yield enthusiastic endorsements when the time comes to request a recommendation letter. Whether through networking events, mentorship programs, or collaborative projects, investing in relationships pays dividends in the form of invaluable support and advocacy. 

Don’t burn bridges

Ever been tempted to run out of a company with your middle finger in the air? I know I have. The funny thing about life, is it has a way of coming back full circle and sometimes that may mean running into an old colleague, boss, or client at a networking event. If you can, try to leave on good terms or at least terms where you can give a “fake nod and smile” if you see someone you used to work with at an industry related event… or the grocery store.

Now, sometimes it’s not possible to leave on good terms, whether its due to a toxic boss or environment, just leave the best way you can and if it burns a bridge, it is what it is. Just don’t make a habit out of it!

Determine your approach

Try not to get too hung up on this part. The way you reach out will usually depend on your relationship with the person. Personally, I’ve even received text messages from previous people I’ve managed and I was fine with it. Below, I’m providing a list of ways you can reach out to someone to ask for a letter of recommendation.

Reaching out in person- this is the ideal method, but typically works best if you’re currently working in the same environment. Schedule a quick meeting, share your goals, and ask if they are willing to write a letter of recommendation for you.

Reaching out over the phone- If you no longer work with the person, reaching out over the phone is the next best option! Take time to catch up with them and let them know what you’re up to. Share that you’re in the process of looking for a new role and wanted to connect to see if they’d be willing to provide a reference letter for you. Let them know the type of job and company you’re targeting. Finally don’t forget to provide them with up to date contact information.

Reaching out by email- If you don’t have the person’s phone number or you know that they prefer email confirmation, send them an email. Make sure that your subject line references the letter of recommendation request. Share the role you’re targeting, why you feel like you’re a good fit, what skills you’d like them to highlight, and any other relevant information that will make writing your letter easy for them. You can even give your potential recommender a copy of your resume. Don’t forget to also give them a due date. Also, the email doesn’t have to be long, keep it straight to the point. Below is an example of a letter of recommendation email.

Hello Mr./Ms. Last Name (or First Name),

I hope all is well. I’m reaching out because I am in the beginning stages of conducting a job search. I’m ready for a new opportunity that is both challenging and rewarding. I’m currently targeting (name the type of role). As you know, my passion is (list a few skills and duties you enjoy). As someone who has witnessed my skills and capabilities, I was hoping that you’d be willing to write a letter of recommendation for me.

The roles I’m targeting are specifically looking for someone with skills in (list 3 major skills). Would you be willing to highlight those in your recommendation for me?

I appreciate and value your time and support. As far as timeframe, I would appreciate it if you could get it back to me by (date). However, I understand that this may not be a good time and if that is the case, I completely understand if you are not currently able to write a letter for me.

Please let me know if you have any questions, thoughts, or concerns. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

Your name

Follow-up with the outcome- Writing letters of recommendation takes time and lots of energy. Show your appreciation by sending a follow-up email a handwritten note, or calling to provide an update and thank-you to those who took the time to support you by providing a recommendation. Share the outcome and if you have time, invite them out to coffee or dinner to catch up. This is a great way to nurture your relationships!

Also, keep in mind relationships are give and take. The truth is many people often agree to do things in hopes that the favor will be returned one day. So get that out of the way and offer to return the favor. Even if they don’t need the favor, your good intentions have been put out there and trust me, they will remember it!

Frequently Asked Questions about Letters of Recommendation

Why are letters of recommendation important?

Everyone wants social proof! Letters of recommendation are essential because they provide external validation of your skills, character, and achievements. When you’re applying for a job, internship, graduate program, or any opportunity where you need to showcase your qualifications, having someone else vouch for you can significantly boost your credibility. These letters offer insights into your strengths, work ethic, and personal qualities from someone who has observed you in a professional or academic setting. They can provide valuable context for your application and give potential employers or admissions committees a deeper understanding of who you are beyond what’s written on your resume or application.

How do you politely ask for a letter of recommendation?

Asking for a letter of recommendation can feel daunting, but with the right approach, it can be a smooth and respectful process. Here’s a step-by-step guide:

Choose the right person: Getting a great recommendation letter starts with asking the right person. Select someone who knows you and your key skills well and can speak positively about your qualifications and character. This could be a former supervisor, professor, mentor, or colleague.

Ask in person or via a personalized message: If possible, ask in person or through a personalized email or message. Start by expressing your gratitude for their support and then explain why you’re seeking their recommendation.

Provide necessary details: Clearly outline the opportunity you’re applying for and any specific points you’d like them to emphasize in the letter. If there’s an actual deadline, make sure to mention it upfront.

Offer an out: People have busy schedules, that’s life. Respectfully acknowledge that they may be busy and assure them that it’s okay if they’re unable to write the letter. Earlier, I mentioned the importance of providing enough notice. I always say, I’d prefer to give you too much time, then no time at all. 

Follow up: If they agree to write the letter, provide all the necessary materials they may need, such as your resume, transcript, and details about the position or program. Follow up closer to the deadline to ensure everything is on track.

Is it OK to ask for a letter of recommendation by email?

Yes, it’s perfectly acceptable to ask for a letter of recommendation via email, especially if you have a professional or academic relationship with the person you’re asking. Just ensure that your email is polite, clear, and personalized. Take the time to explain why you’re asking for their recommendation and provide all the necessary details about the opportunity you’re applying for. Additionally, offer them an easy way to decline if they’re unable to write the letter.

How do you ask for a letter of recommendation status?

It’s reasonable to follow up on the status of your letter of recommendation, especially if there’s a deadline approaching. Here’s how you can do it politely:

Send a gentle reminder: If the deadline is approaching and you haven’t received confirmation that the letter has been submitted, send a polite email to inquire about the status. Express appreciation for their assistance and ask if there’s anything they need from you to complete the letter.

Be understanding: Remember that the person writing your letter may be busy with other commitments, so be patient and understanding in your follow-up communication.

Offer assistance: If they indicate that they haven’t had the chance to write the letter yet, offer to provide any additional information or support they may need to complete it.

Conclusion

If you made it to the end of this article, I know you’re on your way to getting a great letter and even better… a compelling recommendation! In the highly competitive job market today, recommendation letters serve as powerful endorsements of your skills, capabilities, and characteristics. By mastering the art of requesting letters of recommendation, you can empower yourself to seize opportunities and propel your career to new heights. Remember, building and maintaining authentic relationships, crafting polished requests, and expressing gratitude are the cornerstones of a successful recommendation process. I hope that as you embark on this journey, you can now approach each interaction with confidence and assurance. 

You’ve got this! Cheers to your success.